Me and Mama – California

Presently The computer tells me

…. about ME?

Your Existing Situation
Volatile and outgoing. Needs to feel that events are developing along desired lines, otherwise irritation can lead to changeability or superficial activities.

Your Stress Sources
Feels that life has far more to offer and that there are still important things to be achieved–that life must be experienced to the fullest. As a result, she pursues her objectives with a fierce intensity that will not let go of things. Becomes deeply involved and runs the risk of being unable to view things with sufficient objectivity, or calmly enough; is therefore in danger of becoming agitated and of exhausting her nervous energy. Cannot leave things alone and feels she can only be at peace when she has finally reached her goal.

Your Restrained Characteristics
Egocentric and therefore quick to take offense, leaving her rather isolated in her attachments.
The situation is preventing her from establishing herself, but she feels she must make the best of things as they are. Feels that things stand in her way, that circumstances are forcing her to compromise and forgo some pleasures for the time being.

Your Desired Objective
Seeks freedom from problems and a secure state of physical ease in which to relax and recover.

Your Actual Problem
The fear that she might be prevented from achieving the things she wants increases her need for security and freedom from conflict. Is therefore seeking stability and an environment in which she can relax.


Want to find out what your choices may say about you?
http://www.colorquiz.com/

Our Deepest Fear

Our Deepest Fear
By Marianne Williamson

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Summer time

So now that summer is here I don’t know what to do.

I want to sleep. I want to scrapbook. I want to work out. I want to talk on the phone. I want to take a roadtrip. I want to take pictures. I want to ….. do lots of things. SO I guess I do have alot of things I want to do …. It’s just a matter of doing it and being in the mood to do it.

So I sit here and type, and blog, and … look up something for mom. I’m on her laptop. Haha, shows you how lazy I am right now. We have actually done alot. I have balanced my check book, thrown away my old school papers, gone shopping on my own (eeek!), ummmmmm

ok so not alot … but hey atleast im not sitting on my butt doing nothin!
we.. sorta, what do you call what I’m doing now?
^_^

Had a little fun with quizzes

Ironically the below says that I will be missed by Paris Hilton, and well I have a problem with that girl (as you can tell by the last blog post). LOL, enjoy my stupidity. I had to do these, the voices in my head said I had to!!

‘What will your obituary say?’

Amber – [noun]: A person with a sixth sense for detecting the presence of goblins ‘How will you be defined in the dictionary?’

Meltdowns

So now that you have heard about Britney Spears’ melt down you must hear about Paris’ meltdown.
I’m sorry, but everybody else is talking. I might as well direct you to a better website than tell you to pick up a tabloid. I don’t like Paris, so I will not say anything. I just heard on ET (entertainment tonight, and why i am watching it, I do not know) that she was “changing” behind bars already. She says, she was stupid and didn’t care, but it was an act and now she will change. She says she wants to be a better person for the young girls and a better role model. (ppht-yeah right) … SO I guess we will see when her sentence is over.

Amazing Quote

*~ Life is not measured by the breaths we take,
but
by the moments that take our breath away. ~*

Late nights again

This was written on: 06/09/07 at 11:07pm

I am currently in the far back of the expedition right now laying down on the slobber covered soft dog bed in front of the vets office. I am watching Humphrey bite the heck out of this bed…. Sounds fun huh? It actually isn’t that bad!

Anyways, back to the story, … Why I am I in this position at almost 11 p clock at night you might ask? Well, let’s see:

I had just got done babysitting the cute kids next door because the parents got home. As they showed up, mine were leaving the garage. Why?
Well we all know that dogs eat everthing and mine are puppies. Tommy just keeps eating things, and he puked today. Sad huh? Then I guess when I was gone babysitting, he was getting sick again and was trembling!!
So as I was walking home, I just hopped in the car with my family and took off towards the vet!

Now here I am talking to humphrey in the dark by my old church at the vet waiting for my poor baby brother to feel better! I hope he’s ok. Thank you God
for my new blackberry cell phone!!
Night ya’ll!

Um…no comment

<– me, being a bit crazy alone with the camera … a couple days before school got out! On Mother’s day morning we were standing in Elmer’s (a greasy spoon restaurant) with my grandma and Grandpa. (Jerry and Doris- Graham’s other parents) and it is PACKED with people, and families. There are so many, we had to squeeze by to get through the 2 doors, and squeeze through tables. We are standing there all real close so this was bound to happen, and I should have seen it coming. Graham out of the blue had said something to the effect of “Whoa, what the heck?” so I turned my head to look at whatever he was looking at. “No, no turn your head back around.” instantly I realized what he was talking about. Because my mom had no clue what we were talking about he moved my head for her to see. “Did you pierce your ear a third time??” He said to me. Meanwhile I am turning red trying not to say anything because I know I am busted.

All I could stiffle out of my mouth was “Um….Yeah?” My mom stared at me with this …. speechless face. –You know how you can take the palm of your hand and smack someone’s forehead (with the meaning that someone is “dumb”) well then my mom started doing that to me….she was smacking my forehead with the palm of her hand! She’s done that before, but she wasn’t upset then. She wasn’t beating me (honestly), she just didn’t know how to react. And, sadly, I needed someone to smack some sense into me about that time. I couldn’t help but laugh as she thumped my head again. I felt bad, I guess it was nice to have it out in the open. Happy mother’s day mama.We sat down, and during breakfast they all gave me “some looks”, but they weren’t that bad. You could tell no one was very impressed, We talked it out in the car, and they basically were just happy that it wasn’t anything worse. Thankfully, I don’t have to take it out, and I’m keeping it clean, so I’m ok. I just can’t do anything that stupid again.

The story:
A few days before, I pierced my ear above the 2 I already had. All i did was sterilize the earring and poke it right through. The amazing part is that it didn’t hurt, and it still doesn’t hurt. So that means my left ear has a third hole. ^_^ Yeah, so you can call me stupid like my parents, but I love it. I don’t regret it, but I guess it was stupid. I do want a tattoo when I’m old enough, and I do want to pierce my belly button or something else. (Don’t worry, it will be small and barely noticeable so I don’t look like an idiot in Harvard!)

IT’S OVER!!

SO Today was my last day.
My emotions are pretty much a mix of things.
I am more tired than anything else though.

NO MO(RE) SCHOOL!!!!!

I am officially a sophmore!!
I am not at the bottom of the high school food chain anymore! (…well sorta)!
I do not have to get up at 5:30 in the morning!
I do not have to leave my house at 7:03!
I DO NOT HAVE TO RIDE THE DUMB BUS!!!
I do not have to go to school AT ALL!
I have no stress of tests, homework, major friend problems, or stupid people that bug me!
I am free, I am liberated, I am confident, I am happy!!!

YAY!!

Well, to be completely honest, I am going to miss it.
I finally feel like I have a home. Like I have somewhere to go, and make memories.
I feel … safe, and relaxed just when I look around it. I really like my school.
Oh, and see here’s more to the sadess. There are my 3 months of no wandering around the halls aimlessly. No people to run around and see, no teachers to go bug and tell them I love them. No strange vending machines just hanging around waiting for me. No auditorium to sleep in, or run around in. No bathrooms, and stalls to be disgusted with.

So I am just …. every emotion.
Thank God for summer.
^_^
I am going to go scrapbook my memories now!!

HELL-OO vacations, HELL-OO Cali!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me and Pictures

Me, and I can’t remember when.
It was …… ummmm ummmm
it was either 05/29/07 or 05/31/07

OH OH OH!!

I took sooo many pictures, and I am going to upload them on flikr. So that means you will have to go look at them!!

Well the safe pictures atleast, LOL

I am going to put up the pix of me, however I have to wait before I put up pix of my friends. I want to verify or ask them before I do that because this is the World Wide Web you know!!

This was me memorial weekend (sunday to be exact), studying and tanning.

What a combination huh?? I loved it, and I even got color!!! I didn’t burn! YAY! The boys also helped me study.

Flickr Foto Set of Me and My Friends

http://www.flickr.com/photos/boiseit/sets/72157600310048835/

Finals Finally

ME on the couch, 06/03/07 –>

Ugh!

*Backs into corner* I WON”T GO!! NOOOO!!! NOT S-SCH-SCH-SCHOOL!!

DANG FINALS!
I have taken 4 so far. 2 last week, and 2 today. They aren’t that bad, since I have been studying and I know all my stuff. (most of it anyways)

I am actually having fun with them … sorta. I am getting good grades anyways. I have an A in …. well almost everything!! OK OK OK, stupid earth science got me. I love the teacher, he’s awesome. The class however, not my favorite, and the other students give me a headache everyday. *sighs* I got a B as the final grade. I know, I wanted a 4.0 GPA when I graduated, but I-I, I tried.
I can graduate knowing that atleast I tried.
We are all pretty proud, it still sucks for me a little though. I have high expectations of me, but, I have to give myself credit at some point. … right??

I love school, I don’t want it to end!

I am sad right now, there are so many people I know that are leaving to go to another school. Or they are friends that are going to be juniors or seniors, which means that there just won’t be enough time to hang out next year. Or they already have a bucket of plans for the summer, or they are going to be gone for awhile. It all sucks.
On the bright side, I am trying to be positive.
I got a hold of the camera…

Everbody now with me: “UH OH!”
(LOL)
I have been taking sooo many pictures! I am getting all my friends, and my teachers, and everything I can get a pic of! So as you can tell, I am the busy body barefoot girl running down the halls, with a purse, water, and camera chasing after people with all these strange stares at me. I am so excited! I will have so much to scrapbook!

It is summer time!!! New clothes, tanning, getting into shape, time to myself, learn new things, hang out more (…. not working out so well as you can tell from above), shopping, vacations (… sorta, mama and I are going to San Jose for my cousings surgery for about 8 days), swimming, playing with the boys (my baby puppies) and most of all….
NO HOMEWORK!!
…. However, (everybody smile, its the amber we all know and love)
I do want to read, write, study and still work on my studies. I am still adiment about my grades, and being as smart as I can be!

MAYBE, even driving school. Depends …. I mean I want to drive, its just not that big of a priority.

Oh, and I even got out early today. Strangely, none of us told the boys that I was going to be home early, BUT THEY KNEW. They knew the bus that went around had me on it. Usually they know its the kidegarten bus, but for some reason they ran and went to the window because they somehow KNEW that it was sissy.

(By the way, I am sorry if I do not make alot of sense. I have been a little sick for the past couple of days, so I havent been very sharp lately. I have been fogetting things too, like conversations, if I have eaten … The most random things I forget)

Wishing on a Nothing

We all wish right?
So have you ever wished you could change things?
Maybe make things go your way?
Change things about yourself?
JUST WISH THERE WAS CHANGE, AND YOU COULD DO IT?

Yeah, so then I won’t look like a complete idiot when I say that I wish I wasn’t afraid of conflict. I wish I could look people in the eye and tell them HOW I FEEL. Be honest, and be willing to loose a friendship, a relationship, or anything just to be confident.I wish people could sometimes read my mind so that they knew what I was thinking. I wish I could do whatever I wanted without consequences. I wish I had something to blame for everything. I wish I had more common sense. I wish I could find someone to confide in with everything that could talk back when I needed it. I know God does, however not that way I wish He would answer me back. I wish I could ask God a couple questions. I wish I could hunt down the devil and KILL him(don’t we all?). I wish I was invincible. I wish that I couldn’t die. I wish on everything and nothing, because I know it won’t come true.

I know wishing gets you nowhere. I think that’s why I do it. Just to know that there is something that I don’t have control over. Something to tell me that it’s all up to me, not fate or destiny. It’s God, it’s me, it’s you, it’s NOT something that doesn’t exist.

I wish that wishes would come true, so that I could wish that there was no such thing as wishing at all. Then it would just be a nothing. The word wish would not exist till some idiot made it up again and decided to go to webster and make it a stupid lame word.